
Next Best Yes
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Next Best Yes
Episode 70: Becoming Less Through Your Yes: Part 1
Lean into the profound call to humility and its importance in becoming more like Christ
- Understanding Jesus as a servant identity
- Embracing God's call with "yes"
- The struggle of pride in our responses to God
- Self-awareness and recognizing our own sin
- Practical tips for practicing humility in daily life
- Building genuine connections through humility
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He came as a servant, and if we can know what it means for Jesus to come as a servant, then when we find our identity linked to his identity as a servant, then I think we can have a better understanding of what does it mean to be humble, what does it mean to be a servant? Well, look at Jesus. We're Mike and Kelsey, dominey, and we hope that you emerge with a better understanding of God's heart and his call so you can respond with yes, no matter the cost, even when it's scary and even when it doesn't make any sense.
Speaker 2:Scratch that, especially when it doesn't make any sense, because God's plans rarely do.
Speaker 1:So, with biblical study and stories from our life and the lives of others, we talk about what a life fully surrendered to God looks like.
Speaker 2:It's a life of. Yes. Are you ready to discover your next best? Yes, that's not a good way to start with. Uh, uh, is it a great podcast opener and yet we're keeping it in, aren't we? You're looking at me and you're not stopping the recording.
Speaker 1:Talking about humility.
Speaker 2:We started talking about humility two episodes ago in our little three episode mini arc about talking about the fruit of waiting and humility being one of those, and then, as we were talking about where to go next, we just really felt like we wanted to lean into that humility conversation a little bit more.
Speaker 1:Yeah, let's not move off of that so quick.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and so this is not the definitive work on humility.
Speaker 2:This is not the end-all, be-all everything you need to know about humility, because we're so probably the best humility teaching that you will hear, is right here what I was trying to say is that all we're doing is sharing what we're learning and, um, hopefully it'll help you as you learn to be more humble too. Uh, part of humility is not just being a terrible podcast host who has failed to speak eloquently to kick off this episode. Mike and I were looking at each other before he hit record and we're like who's gonna start? And we stopped and we prayed and like, okay, who's gonna kick it off? And I felt very confident. I was like I know what I'm gonna say I I know how to kick this thing off.
Speaker 2:He hits record and I'm just like uh.
Speaker 1:Isn't that just the way life is, sometimes Like I got this and then it's like uh.
Speaker 2:Now you could have stopped recording, but you could have, but next week we're talking about being vulnerable.
Speaker 1:So all these things combined mean we get to throw open the curtain a little bit and see what's behind there.
Speaker 2:Yeah. So here we are. We're talking about humility and tying that into our next best yes conversation. I was realizing I was thinking about this, that next best yes, like giving our yes to God. It can be very prideful, it can be very like oh God, yeah, I'll make time for that in my schedule. I will say yes to you Aren't you lucky, god, that I'm on your team. Like, yeah, god, good idea, I'll take it and I'll run with it. I'll do that thing that you put on my heart, whatever.
Speaker 1:Right. God came to me. He asked me, and I said yes, I'll do that.
Speaker 2:It can be very prideful. It obviously can also be very humble.
Speaker 1:It's a mindset thing. That's our hope.
Speaker 2:We can respond to God with a yes of yes, god, I will obey and I will follow, even when it doesn't make sense. So that is the heart that we're hoping to communicate through this entire ministry that God's given us of next best yes. But I just wanted to acknowledge that when we're saying yes to God, when we feel like he's put something in our hearts, when he feels like he's calling us in a direction, when he feels like he's told us to do something or stop doing something or slow down, whatever he's requesting of us, whatever the king is saying, that would require our response of yes. May we approach that with humility. And so we're going to talk about humility here on the podcast Great and Kelsey sitting here with Mike.
Speaker 1:Mike here.
Speaker 2:Do you know, paul? I know a Paul.
Speaker 1:I know a couple of Pauls.
Speaker 2:Yeah, do you know the Paul that wrote like the majority of the New Testament?
Speaker 1:Not personally, but I've read his books. You've read his books.
Speaker 2:Big fan, do you wish that you were more like him, sometimes Like do you wish that you could be a teacher on the level?
Speaker 1:I mean I would say on the whole yes.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I, I. In first Corinthians 11, one he actually tells us to be like him. He says imitate me as I imitate Christ. Yes, so being more like Paul is being more like Jesus, which is the ultimate goal of everything, all the time. So I think Paul's a real great example and a real like strong person to be like, don't you think?
Speaker 1:I would assume so. Since it's in the Bible, I'll go with that.
Speaker 2:I don't know, I'd like to be like him.
Speaker 1:But then he says of himself in 1 Timothy. What's he say In 1 Timothy? Why don't you disclose?
Speaker 2:I disclose In 1 Timothy 1.15, he says here's a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance. Timothy 115,. He says here's a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance Jesus Christ came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the worst, says Paul. The worst of sinners. And yet in 1 Corinthians he tells us to be like him. So we should be like the worst of sinners.
Speaker 1:Yes, it was, it is. That is a weird phrase, isn't it like it sounds like like, what is he saying? Like, what is he doing? If he's saying like I'm the worst sinner? I think some translations say he's like the chief, like I'm the chief sinner, or something like that. What is, what is that? Because I mean, he's, he's obviously not lying.
Speaker 1:For a while I had been thinking like, well, maybe that's what humility is, when you just kind of like say that you're the worst, and you say it often enough that you believe it. And then, um, you kind of like act humble in, in, just kind of like act humble in, in just kind of assuming the lowest position, the worst position, then you will. It's almost like swinging the pendulum on the opposite side, like I don't want to be arrogant, so I'm just going to kind of live on the opposite side of the swing of the pendulum and just say like, well, I'm, wow, yeah, I am far from that. I am like the worst. Like and and and. Wow, yeah, I am far from that. I am like the worst.
Speaker 1:And Paul's not even in a self-deprecating way, like sometimes I will do in trying to avoid the other extreme. But I heard someone teach about this phrase before this instance of Paul calling himself the worst sinner, and he was saying that I think what Paul is doing is he is speaking from his own perspective, meaning like he, paul, is so aware of the sin in his life. And again, not like guilt, not like oh, I feel so guilty, I feel so much shame, I just hate myself. Like not that, like oh man, I'm such a sinful person and I'm ashamed Like no, you got to give that guilt and shame to Jesus.
Speaker 2:Because the same guy also wrote there's no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.
Speaker 1:So this is clearly not from a place of like oh, I feel so bad about myself, I'm the worst and I should feel guilty. But it's a sense of his perspective, is self-awareness. Like he also teaches, like he captures every thought, makes it captive to Christ. And as you do that, you start to recognize how often you have to go to God and repent, right Like he's. He is so focused on like, oh man, that was a sin I sinned. Oh God, please forgive me. And oh man, I sinned again. Wow, how many times, god, I've had to come to you to repent for like 10 times today.
Speaker 1:Like this is how, what a wretch am I, you know? Like man, I can't even do it right. Like he says like no, I, I, I know what I want to do, but I don't do it. I know what I, I don't want to do, and then I do it Like what is what is up with this? And he's just so in this mode. He's so aware of his own sin, so much that he can't possibly imagine someone else sinning more than him. He's just like I sin all the time. I am aware of every time I sin, lord willing, and it's so much like I can't imagine anyone else sinning more than I sin. And isn't that an interesting heart check for us? Because I'll tell you, I am very aware of other people's sin, like at church or with friends, or in my marriage. I'm like I'm very aware of when other people are sinning and I'm like, oh man, like just their sin is just so obvious to me. Why isn't it obvious to them?
Speaker 2:It's like the classic sitting in church and hearing a sermon and thinking of all the other people that need to hear it, man.
Speaker 1:You know who needs to hear this.
Speaker 2:I hope they're tuning in. I hope they're here. You look at them.
Speaker 1:Are they paying attention? Nope, they're on the phone. Another sin. And it's so easy for us to do that, to be so aware of other people's sins that, like man, maybe I should just give that much time and attention that I give to, like, recognizing other people's sins. What if I gave that much time and attention on my own sin in my own life to the point where sure, life to the point where sure, yeah, other people sin too, like we all sin, but like it can't possibly be more than than my sin, because I'm just paying so much attention to when it crops up in my life and dealing with it as it comes up, and then I and what I'm hearing, mike too, is if I'm so focused on wanting to be like christ that I am focused on my sin so that I can repent of it, I just don't have the energy to also be that focused on other people's sin.
Speaker 2:Like even even if it isn't a whole, like I can't imagine other people sinning more than me. It's like you're not imagining other people sinning, You're just focused on on the ways in which you fall short and wanting to repent of that. So it's just like the focus isn't. I'm not thinking about other people and how much they're sinning.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:I am. So it's like it's not that I can't imagine someone sinning more than me, it's that I'm not imagining other people sinning. I'm not like sitting here in judgment over other people. Yeah, Because I'm very aware of of my own shortcomings.
Speaker 1:Yet it. We can't just dwell in this, thinking about ourself all the time, right Like we do. We do need to be aware of our sin and deal with that with God, and but, but we can't just say so self-focused, because then that's not humility. And I think what, when I recognize, like okay, other people, they might say but there's no way, no way that there's more than me, you know, um, more than me, you know that? I think that gives us a lot of freedom to recognize the best in other people and take interest in them.
Speaker 1:It's like I'm not. I'm not focused on their sin. I'm not like, when they are talking to me or I hear something from them, like it's not. I'm not like filtering it through, like, oh, what's the sin in their life? Oh, sinful, I've already given that up. I don't mean I, Mike, I'm like theoretically ideal version of me, perhaps, um, but we get to give our attention to just the things that are on their heart, you know like, and how can we pour into them? How can we encourage them?
Speaker 2:We can fully love them more effectively. I think that's it better than you or not thinking of all the sin that you need to deal with in your life, because I'm honestly, when it comes to sin, I'm more focused on my sin and my rightness with Christ, so that when I am with you, I can more truly, purely love you, because I'm not focused on all your shortcomings and all your sins and all the ways you need to fix your life. I can just listen to you. I can genuinely and humbly listen and care for you and pray with you and go to the Lord with you, like I can do those things. That's an outpouring of the humility, is an ability to love people more genuinely.
Speaker 1:CS Lewis wrote in Mere Christianity about what it looks like to see what a really humble person looks like. Because we have this idea it's like, what does it look like to be really humble? And he kind of paints a picture like this. He says do not imagine that if you meet a really humble man, he will be what most people call humble nowadays. He will not be a sort of greasy, smarmy person who's always telling you that of course he is nobody. Probably all you will think about him is he seemed a cheerful, intelligent chap who took a real interest in what you said to him. If you do dislike him, it will be because you feel a little envious of anyone who seems to enjoy life so easily. He will not be thinking about humility, he'll not be thinking about himself at all.
Speaker 2:End quote I don't know if it's like effective for uh, our listener, for you to be speaking I think it's more effective.
Speaker 1:But I like that's an important note here. It's. This is not about thinking about humility Like, oh, I gotta be more humble, I just gotta be more humble. Oh man, I did. I was pretty humble when I did that. That was good. Like, oh man, I've been more humble lately. I'm more humble now than I used to be.
Speaker 1:Like those sort of things are like those are honestly footholds for Satan to be like, wow, you're pretty good at this humble thing, and then he just unravels the work that you had just done. And so it's not about trying to be humble, it's trying to put others above yourself. And one way to do that is to consider yourself the chief of sinners. Based on how often you are aware of your own sin and how often you go to God to help deal with it, you can realize, oh man, others are better than me genuinely, and I want to take interest in the people who are better than me. You know I want to and I want to. I want to love them, I want to serve them, Like I think not having you know, not being there, I think that is kind of a picture of of what Paul's talking about what of what Paul's talking about, what CS Lewis is talking about and where we can strive to be.
Speaker 2:And when you're thinking of others more. Philippians 2.1 says it thinking of others as better than yourself. It also puts you in a position to love people and want to learn from others. When we're not considering our own sin, when we're thinking that we're better than other people and someone really comes to you with who you would consider as like a worse sinner than you, then you are not in a position to learn from that person at all, like we put ourselves. Maybe I should use I statements, but I'll put myself in a position of thinking like, yeah, I can help them, but they don't have anything to teach me. As opposed to humbling myself, thinking of them as better than me, then anyone who's help them, but they don't have anything to teach me. As opposed to humbling myself, thinking of them as better than me, then anyone who's coming, even if they're coming to me for help or advice, I can see them as someone I can learn from too. And and when you see others, even those who need your help, but you see them as someone that you can learn from, I don't know. That just strikes me as really humble as well, like I don't know. That just strikes me as really humble as well, like I don't.
Speaker 2:I have a lot of people that come to me for advice and I don't I don't know why, but I just end up being in conversations a lot where people are like, well, what do you, what do you think I'd like your advice?
Speaker 2:And it can be a really like pride building thing of like, oh yeah, people want to learn from me, people want to know what I have to say. Those conversations can go in such a way that I can take an interest in them and want to learn from them as well, and then it's more empowering to that person that they're not lacking anything, like they have the Holy Spirit in them, just like I do. Like that person can teach me as well. And so those who see me as someone who could coach or advise or teach them something, when I approach those conversations with curiosity, understand that there's someone who isn't in need of me. But, a we're both in need of Jesus and B I have something to learn from them. That puts me in a place of humility, that puts me in a place of thinking of them better than myself.
Speaker 1:Yeah, the idea of allowing yourself to be taught or maybe, more generally speaking, allow yourself to be impacted by what someone says, I think is a posture that I'm still working on. I'm aware of the benefits because I've been on the receiving end. I've been talking about something and somebody who, frankly, I think, knows more than me about a topic, about something, and somebody who, frankly, I think, knows more than me about a topic, um, but they're they're acting humbly, um, and choosing to honor me and, and I say something, they say oh, wow, like, and I'm like, oh, was that, was that good?
Speaker 1:and they're like oh man, I hadn't thought about that and I'm like and that and that makes me feel good. You know, gotta now work to not let that develop into pride.
Speaker 1:But I have been on the receiving end of someone being impacted by something I say, even though I didn't think I had anything to teach them.
Speaker 1:I'm just kind of talking to them, I wasn't trying to teach anything, I wasn't trying to say anything memorable, but they were, they allowed themselves to be impacted by what I say and and I would like to be able to develop in that way too, to just be impacted by when someone says something, having a posture of like I'm here to, like I don't know everything, because I've also been in part of conversations where I'm saying something and the other person says, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, and I'm like, oh, so you already? Okay, you're like, you're like okay, do I need to stop talking? Like, are we done? You know, and that's not necessarily the attitude of the person or it's not what they intend. But there's a difference between going into a conversation thinking you kind of you know, know about it and there's nothing there to get that you can get from it, or versus going and being impacted. And I know this because Jesus, in his conversations, he allowed himself to be impacted by what people said, which is ridiculous.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the fact that Jesus was ever surprised.
Speaker 1:Now I would say because he's God.
Speaker 1:No one taught him anything, but people certainly impacted him. He certainly allowed himself to be surprised. He allowed himself to be impacted Like the faith of the centurion that said oh no, you don't need to come to my house, Just say the word and it'll be done. You've got that sort of authority. I know it. Jesus is like wow, he's looking around his disciples like you hear this. I haven't heard this kind of faith from anyone, let alone a Gentile. This is amazing. Another Gentile woman I'm sorry, I've come for the Jews, I haven't come for the Gentiles and she's like well, even the. What a response. That's awesome. Yeah, absolutely, here you go.
Speaker 1:So Jesus allowed himself to be impacted and that is a posture of humility that we can take just to go into conversations. I think this is like maybe a practical tip and a takeaway here from this episode. Like we can just go into a conversation and be open to be impacted by the person and don't do silently, do it vocally wow, oh, wow, yeah, and thought about that, or that's good, like those sort of things to let the person know like you have, you have great value to add, like this, and I'm blessed by what you're saying, and I really like the way you're thinking. You could even say those things. That would be a blessing to them as well, and, uh and who knows, maybe that person has been doubting the value that they add, and maybe that could be a conversation that turns things around.
Speaker 1:Jesus, ultimately, is the example for what it looks like to live humbly. Paul is only saying, yeah, follow me if you want, but ultimately I'm just trying to be like Jesus, so you need to be like Jesus. If being like me helps you get there, then all right. Praise God, I'll do my best, but you got to be like Jesus. And Philippians 2 paints that picture of like. What does humility look like in God himself? Being humble Isn't that crazy, though? Like the fact that God?
Speaker 1:would humble himself.
Speaker 1:I am no world religion expert, but I'm going to be fairly confidently. I'm going to fairly confidently say there is no other religion asterisk, I'm not an expert, but there is no other religion where the God is humble and puts humanity above himself. There is no way, there's no way that any other religion does that. And I I hate to lump Christianity and following Jesus into the religion category, but you know, on the grand scheme of the conversation, because there is one true God and he is humble, everything else comes from Satan and he's the opposite. So God humbling himself is a wildly scandalous truth about this faith that we have, and we see it play out in Philippians 2, chapter 2, verse 1. It says is there any encouragement from belonging to Christ, any comfort from his love, any fellowship together in the spirit? Are your hearts tender and compassionate? Then make me truly happy by being wholehearted with each other, loving one another and working together with one mind and purpose. That's like hey, paul, telling the church this is what we got to look like, right? Don't be selfish, don't try to impress others. This is what we mentioned earlier. Be humble. Thinking of others is better than yourselves. Don't look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others too. You must have the same attitude, that is, all those things. Like all those things, like all those things we see. You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges and he took on the humble position of a slave and he was born as a human being and when he appeared in human form, he humbled himself in obedience to God. That's like double humility, Like he humbled himself to take on the position of a human and then, as a human, he humbled himself again to obey God. As a human, he died a criminal's death on a cross and therefore God elevated him to the highest place of honor and gave him the name, above all other names, that at the name of Jesus, every knee should bow in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue could declare that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God, the father.
Speaker 1:We can only be humble if we find our identity. It's an identity thing. It's not a five tips and tricks to help you become more humble. It's not, I don't know, like a step process, and it's not even something that that you alone can just manufacture. We're going to talk about this more next week, next episode. It's it's an identity thing where we realize Jesus came as a servant. Like he says, the son of man didn't come to serve, come to be served, but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many. He came as a servant. And if, if we can know what it means for Jesus to come as a servant, then when we find our identity linked to his identity as a servant, then I think we can have a better understanding of what does it mean to be humble, what does it mean to be a servant? Well, look at Jesus.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's not thinking lowly of yourself, it's not like the CS Lewis quote, just someone going around saying oh, I'm nobody, I'm nobody. That's not like the CS Lewis quote just someone going around saying, oh, I'm nobody, I'm nobody. That's not humility. You don't see Christ going around me like.
Speaker 1:I'm nobody, I'm worthless, I don't have any value. Right, I don't have anything to add.
Speaker 2:It's understanding who you are in light of who God is, how you've been positioned in light of what God has called for your life, how what God's called of you, and it's positioning yourself first and foremost in comparison to Christ and understanding you're not that big of a deal. And and then the phrase just jumps out to me that he humbled himself in obedience to God. Like, if you want some tips and tricks on how to be humble, obey God, like choosing to obey God gave us a free will to choose, and choosing to obey him is acting like Jesus, is being humble Like Christ. Choosing to humble yourself to obedience is, I just think, paramount to this entire conversation. Yeah.
Speaker 1:And Jesus serves as the ultimate example, because there is no one who can claim as high of a position as Jesus had before coming to earth, right Like there is nobody who is a bigger deal than God himself sitting on the right hand of the throne of the father. No one could possibly even humble themselves more than he did to take on the lowest of the low, a poor baby immigrant, a poor baby refugee, basically.
Speaker 2:And then and then, as a human being, there's been no human being who could have just done what was right in his own eyes and be right. Could have just done what was right in his own eyes and be right Like Jesus could have, because he did not sin. He could have just done what he wanted to do and not sin in it, yet he still humbled himself to obey God, the Father, like it's kind of it's mind-blowing.
Speaker 1:Which is, I'm glad, why Paul says you have to have the same attitude that Christ Jesus said, because you're not going to do the same level of humility, but you have to have the same attitude which led him to do what he did. And that attitude is what's going to really bring us to a place where, like we talked about a couple of weeks ago, like in the waiting, God is drawing us to a place of greater humility, and that's a fruit of like. That's what he wants, because it pride is the root of every sin, and he does not want that in our life, not because he's mean, but because he loves us and cares for us, and he knows the damage that pride can do in our hearts. And so this is humility is the key to friendship with God. Humility is the key to to a good relationship with God. Yeah, and and Jesus gave us that example of like you want to be close to God. I know more than anyone what it means to be close to God and I'll tell you it's humility.
Speaker 2:That's crazy. Is it possible for us to choose to be humble? Is it possible for us to humble ourselves, or are we just waiting for God to tear us down from our self-made mountains of pride and humble us?
Speaker 1:Is it an active thing or is it a passive thing that we surrender?
Speaker 2:to.
Speaker 1:That sounds like a good conversation for the next episode, exactly, yeah, so next week we're going to continue this conversation about humility, specifically like what is our role in it? Today we talked a little bit about like all right, well, here's maybe some things, kind of ways to resemble that attitude and have that come out in our conversations and our behaviors. But next week let's dig into can you humble yourself? What does it look like? Is it an active thing? Is it a passive thing? Do we allow it? Does it happen? Regardless of whether or not we allow it, there's some good things to dig into. So we'll take a look at that next week. Take a look at some key passages that talk about humility and humbling yourself and what that looks like. And I think through our discussions I think we found I don't know if you call it a fast track, but kind of a way to really lean into the process of humility, and so let's talk about that more next week on the next Best yes podcast. We'll see you then.
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